Classes start Monday---time to panic! But I've finished my syllabi and prepped my classes so I'm a little lacking in panic-worthy material. Think think think...
My clothes!!! Do I have anything decent to wear on Monday? Will my teaching clothes still fit despite the excesses of the holidays? Do I need to wash, iron, sew on buttons? Shall I go shopping for a new outfit despite the fact that it's bad luck to wear new clothes on the first day of class? Or is that just an old wives' tale? Do old wives' tales work for old wives as well as for young ones? How old do I have to be before I qualify as an old wife? Or does "old" in this context refer to length of marriage rather than age?
Speaking of old, what am I going to do with my hair? I need a haircut. Can I find someone to give me a trim without an appointment today? Those walk-in haircut places can be, how shall we say this tactfully, inconsistent. On the other hand, could a bad haircut possibly make my hair look any worse than it does right this minute? My hairstyle looks like what happens when you hand scissors and mousse to a three-year-old. I can't walk into class looking like this!!!
Good thing I won't be driving into class because my car looks like it's suffering from an advanced case of leprosy. Time to wash off the road salt! And my tote bag is marked with a map of my travels in tea stains. My shoes are scuffed! I've lost one of my favorite earrings! I can't see well enough to pluck my eyebrows even with my glasses on! Calgon, take me away!
Good thing my syllabi are done because it looks like I'll have my hands full this weekend just managing my panic.
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