Monday, April 23, 2018

Looking back, looking forward: an exercise in burying the lede

I've been wanting to write about how great All Scholars Day was last Friday, how we had a few last-minute glitches but we dealt with them and moved on, how wonderful it was to see the students spiffed up like professionals to present the results of all their hard work and research, how some of the sessions were so crowded we ran out of chairs and the new rolling display walls looked great and were easy to set up and how much I appreciated my helpful  student workers and how my husband showed up at exactly the right time to carry a heavy box back to my office and how much I relished pretty much every single moment of the day, but I can't. The whole event wore me out so much that every time I try to talk about it, I become a blithering idiot.

So I spent a lot of time not thinking about it over the weekend, which was fine because I had other things to think about (like my husband's big nerve-wracking job interview for a job he really really really wants), and then I came back to my office this morning and noticed that the work is not quite over: I have boxes of stuff that has to be taken to various people on campus, an invoice to submit and thumbtacks to stash in the supply closet and two big boxes of commemorative imprinted pub glasses I need to find an equitable way to distribute--and oh yes, I'd better hold on to the empty boxes afterward in case anyone near and dear to me might be moving this summer because HE GOT THE JOB HE GOT THE JOB HE GOT THE JOB!!

So yeah, a lot of things to think about. Great event, woo-hoo!, well done all, but now I get to think about packing up stuff and moving it to Jackson, Ohio, where my husband will  serve as pastor of a medium-sized church beginning July 1. He'll live in the (small but well maintained) parsonage and I'll stay at our current house but travel to Jackson on weekends and holidays, and so we will join the long list of academic couples pursuing their dreams at a distance from each other. It's only about a 90-minute drive on four-lane highways through gorgeous Appalachian landscape, so I'm not complaining. Still, it is a little daunting to think about maintaining two households. 

Step one: I'm getting myself a lawnmower--one that I can start without help. Steps two through two million will have to wait until I've recovered from a whirlwind week.

4 comments:

Bardiac said...

Congratulations to your beloved on getting a job he looks forward to!

It seems like a hard thing to deal with a separation, even of 5 days at a time, but I hope the opportunity works out well for both of you!

Bev said...

Yes, there will be challenges, some of which we've already anticipated. I worry a little more about the unexpected challenges, but we've got experience dealing with those.

Contingent Cassandra said...

As a current member of a search committee for a pastor (different mainline denomination, so probably slightly different process, but probably not all that different), I can imagine how thrilled your husband's future congregation is to have found the right person. And I'm sure he's equally thrilled to have found the right job for him. Best wishes on the transition -- it sounds doable, but, yes, a challenge.

I hope the congregation is sympathetic to the challenges of their pastor being part of a two-career couple. From listening in between the lines in conversations with both candidates and their references, I'm getting the sense that some are, and some aren't (and then individuals within congregations vary as well; our congregation is generally pretty flexible, but one member explicitly told me that she's longing for a pastor's wife who sees that role as her primary job, which expectation, even if it were legal or acceptable under denominational rules, just isn't realistic in our high-cost-of-living area. The closest we've had to a "traditional" clergy spouse in decades was the husband of our last pastor, who was himself a retired pastor, and so free to play quite an active, though mostly behind the scenes, role). Of course, those that haven't yet adjusted to the realities of modern marriage will need to do so in the near future. At least in my denomination, clergy couples are increasingly common, and, while some choose to be co-pastors, others are adamant that it's best for both their marriage and their congregations that they have separate careers.

Anyway, best wishes to both of you. I'm sure it will work out, though it sounds like you'll be going from a very busy semester to a very busy beginning of the summer.

Bev said...

Thanks! The congregation was very supportive and only worried that the distance might put a strain on us rather than on the church. It looks like a good situation all around, but only time will tell.