Journeying in a nightmare world

Lately I've been struggling with logistical nightmares--literally. Instead of waking up screaming from dreams about invasions of nasty critters, I'm alert at 3 a.m. in a cold sweat after a nightmare about the problems inherent in getting certain people from point A to point B. In one dream I'm frantically trying to pack for an immediate departure but my very young daughter keeps taking things out of the suitcase as quickly as I put them in there, and in another I'm trying to transport my small children across a post-apocalyptic landscape but I can't find adequate food so I have to stop them from eating random stuff they pick up off the ground, and in the worst nightmare I suddenly realize, in the middle of a complicated journey, that I've accidentally misplaced a child. Terrifying.

I could understand having these dreams back when I was responsible for planning one of our many camping trips when my kids were little, like the time we drove to the Grand Canyon camping all the way or the weeks we spent camping in the Great Smoky Mountains. Making reservations, stocking up on supplies, and packing all the camping gear for a family of four was enough to give anyone nightmares, while planning a workable route in the pre-GPS era presented its own special challenges. 

But I don't do that any more. Our trips these days are much simpler and more focused: the two of us pack for ourselves, drive someplace interesting, and stay in a motel or rental or with relatives. No nightmares need apply.

And yet here I am, waking up frantically night after night from dreams of thwarted journeys presenting logistical challenges incapable of resolution. I sense a theme, but I don't know what it means. I'm reminded, though, of my father's nightmares about running from floods, recurrent frightening dreams that stopped only after our family weathered the floods following Hurricane Agnes in Pennsylvania in 1972. We lived through danger and terror and rampant destruction but came out unharmed, and after that Dad's flood dreams dissipated.

So maybe what I need is to start living dangerously: plan a logistical nightmare of a trip in hopes of banishing the logistical nightmares haunting my dreams. But where should I go, and how can I heighten the risk level to make the journey less comfortable, predictable, and safe? 

Maybe I'll just plan a comforting staycation. After all those nightmares, I could really use a nap.