Monday, December 03, 2012

Shopping at work: so wrong but so right

The chief disadvantage of online shopping is that I miss that holiday magic--the sparkly lights, the shoppers elbowing one another toward the latest techno-gewgaw, the jangly renditions of "Frosty the Snowman" wafting through the air. 

But those are also online shopping's chief advantages.

I like Christmas shopping--in theory. In practice, I get annoyed. I'm not a fan of crowds, especially desperate ones, and I surpassed my quota of "Jingle Bell Rock" renditions decades ago. Part of me finds online shopping wretchedly impersonal, but I've spent the past two weekends trying to shop locally with little success. I'm not in the market for any more scented candles or overpriced faux-primitive craft items, thank you very much, and the local pasta place is all sold out of the gluten-free items I'd like to send to a certain family on my list.

So instead I'm sitting in my office using my college-issued computer on college time and ordering gifts online accompanied by Vince Guaraldi playing the Charlie Brown theme. I don't feel at all guilty about shopping at work because I have a list of students desperate to meet with me about their final papers due this week, but they keep missing their appointments. One student missed an appointment late Friday afternoon, which ought to be illegal. Online shopping distracts me from thinking of nefarious ways to torture students who skip Friday-afternoon appointments.

So I'm looking at fruit baskets online and wondering whether those pears taste as good as they look. Are they juicy enough to justify the delivery charge? If they save me from another wasted Saturday spent wandering aimlessly through uninspiring stores, they'll do just fine.  

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