Ant bytes

I need to get a computer de-bugged, but this time I don't intend to call on my favorite computer geek. What I really need is an exterminator.

My computer has ants. I don't know if they're actually in the computer itself, but they are making a nuisance of themselves all over the computer desk and on the keyboard, and if I sit here long enough, they crawl up my arms. What do they want? If I leave them alone, maybe they'll join forces, jump up and down on the keys, and leave me a message: "We have your hard drive! If you ever want to see it again, leave a five-pound sack of sugar on the floor. If you fail to comply with our request, we will eat up all your bytes!"

We have had problems with ants on and off since we've lived here, but this is the first time they've shown any interest in my computer. There's a pretty big ant colony under the front porch, and we have been attempting to discourage them by filling the cracks in the concrete, spreading potent poisons, and pouring dry grits near the entrance to their colony. The ants take the grits into the hill and eat them, at which point the grits are supposed to swell up and explode, killing the ants. That's the theory, anyway. So far I haven't noticed an epidemic of exploding ants in the immediate environs.

I don't intend to spread dry grits on my keyboard or ant poison either. What is the best way to de-bug a computer? Maybe it's time to adopt an anteater, but where do I find one compatible with Linux?