Someone said that working in academe right now is like desperately holding on to an abusive relationship: just when you think things are getting better, a fist comes flying at you out of nowhere.
It was nothing, really--just a little love-tap. Probably entirely accidental. Taking this latest blow personally would be just as petty and childish as taking bad weather personally. I mean, the storm hits everyone--it's not particularly intent upon ruining my weekend. But it would be nice to be able to do the work I love without wondering when I'll be floored by another arbitrary slap in the face.
While I play the toddler pouting in the corner, I wonder what it would be like if toddlers ruled the College. A previous administration taught us what Leadership by Tantrum looks like, and we've seen any number of bright shiny programs and plans get tossed aside the moment a new toy gets plopped down in the playroom. We've seen otherwise rational people hoarding goodies so no one else can touch them, and we've seen the hand of discipline being applied to exactly the wrong backside. Most of all, we've learned that it does no good to stomp our feet and cry that It's not fair! The kid who cries the loudest may occasionally get rewarded, but he's more often sent to the time-out box. So I'll sit over in my corner and sulk for a bit, but by next week this will all be forgotten and I'll be back in the playroom hoping for the best. (And--wham!)
These toys are mine,
and that one, too!
I don't want you,
or you, or you
to touch my things.
So here's the line:
on this side, every-
thing is mine.
On your side, play
with broken toys.
Not fair? Who cares!
These bring me joy!
Hey, give it back!
Don't make me mad!
Don't kick or I'll
be calling Dad!
I'll scream and cry
and raise a fuss!
He's here! Oh dear--
now all of us
are fleeing from
his angry spanks.
He missed! I'm safe!
He got you! Thanks
For soaking up
his angry blows.
Next time he'll get me.
(So it goes.)
Now your turn: what would happen if toddlers ruled your workplace?
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