Wednesday, February 01, 2023

Foxtrotting among the kitties

Yesterday a colleague was telling me how soothing it was to go home after a stressful meeting and relax with her new kitten purring on her lap, and I had a brainstorm: We need therapy cats at campus meetings.

Think of all the things you can't do with a cat sleeping on your lap. You can't jump up and start shouting, for one thing, and even vigorous finger-pointing is bound to distract the nearby kitties.

Of course we might run into problems if colleagues are allergic cats, and we might see factions forming between cat people and dog people, not to mention those who find comfort in the presence of reptiles. We can divide up faculty meeting rooms into cat sections and dog sections, with a token nook for the odd tortoise lover, but that might lead to more division.

If not therapy animals, then how about ballroom dance? I read today in a student paper that "Every minuet is a blessing," so how about conducting campus business while engaged in a quadrille? The need to pay close attention to the steps would eliminate frivolous rabbit trails, and following the figures would enhance cooperation, unless issues arise over, for instance, who will take the lead in the foxtrot.

Maybe that's the time to bring the therapy animals into the ballroom. Chaos would ensue, but at least it would be more amusing than the chaos we're currently experiencing.

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