Give me a "Give me an A!" (Please?)

I walked down to the department office just to take a break and gripe about all the grading, and one of my colleagues said, "You can do it! Go go go!" And that's when I realized what I need to get through all the coming week: Cheerleaders.

Why not? Even utterly inept athletic teams merit cheerleaders, so why not those of us who do the academic work of the college? Surely someone could come up with some grading-related cheers:

Two bits, four bits, six bits, a dollar, 
make those spelling errors stand up and holler!

Give me an A! Give me some B's! Give me some C's! Give me some D's! Give me an F!
What's it spell? Bell curve! Bell curve! Bell curve!

Red pens to the rescue! Go! Grade! Win!

But since we don't all grade in a central area, we would need roving bands of cheerleaders going from office to office to jump and prance and shout encouragement, although frankly I don't know how they'd pull of those big pyramids and jumps in my little office. OSHA would probably object.

So instead I'll grab some pom-poms and offer encouragement to my colleagues who are similarly immersed in end-of-the-semester grading. Grab that red pen! Go! Grade! Win!

(Just don't ask me to do any fancy splits or jumps. I'll never get my grading done if I can't get up off the floor.)