The smell of the funnel cakes, the roar of the hog

I'm sitting on a bench breathing in that familiar county-fair aroma and trying to distinguish its constituent parts: cotton candy, onion rings, and funnel-cake grease combined with diesel fumes, sweat, and a whiff of the livestock barn. Nearby some teens in tank tops and torn jeans flirt shamelessly while a mom orders lemon shake-ups for her thirsty crew, and in the background I hear music that I swear sounds like a mutant hybrid of rap and country. We're definitely not in Kansas anymore.

We're at the Jackson County Fair, located not in Jackson but in the nearby town of Wellston, Ohio. It's a small fair but plenty colorful, and we're just in time to see some 4-H members auction off their chickens, goats, and rabbits. Men in plaid shirts and cowboy hats cluster inside the auction enclosure to bid exhorbitant sums for the rabbit trembling nervously in the arms of a pig-tailed girl in a white shirt and spotless jeans. Meanwhile, outside the barn the grand champion hog balks and squawks, objecting to being moved to the arena.

I don't blame the hog: the place is crammed full of people, and the huge ceiling fan does little to dissipate the blistering heat. The auctioneer's voice pierces the air and hammers on and on through the afternoon while his bid-spotters out in the crowd holler out when they catch a bid. If I were a hog, I'd want to go wallow someplace quiet in some nice cool mud.

Instead, we wallow in fair food, although not too much. Is there anything they won't deep-fry? I've eaten a fried Oreo once and I think I've met my lifetime quota, but in this heat a peach sno-cone refreshes the tissues nicely. We nip inside the Junior Fair barn to enjoy the air conditioning and look at the 4-H displays: one poster illustrates parts of a goat while another demonstrates a child's first attempts at photography, and over there is a whole booth full of colorful hand-crafted jellyfish made of yarn. So much creativity! So many colors!

Outside the sky darkens and the lights come up all over the midway, a million bright colors competing for attention. Here's a new attraction called the Hampster Wheel--inflated plastic wheels floating on water that you can climb inside and spin--and I'm tempted to point out the spelling error, but anyone who goes to the fair to correct spelling is sort of missing the point.

The Tilt-A-Whirl spins into the sky where dark clouds loom, threatening rain. The first raindrops hit as we leave the parking lot and soon we're driving through a storm more exciting than any thrill ride--but that's a story for another day. 

Hamster wheels getting inflated.

Bid-spotter at the auction arena.

4-H members waiting to enter the arena.

Time to go home!