Actual conversation in class this morning:
Student: Is this going to be one of those write-until-your-hand-falls-off exams?
Me: Yes, and if you leave the room with both hands still attached, you fail.
Student: You ought to have a big basket by the door, and anyone who doesn't drop a hand in it gets an F.
Another student: And then you can hold out the basket and say, "Need a hand?"
(And they ask me why I love my job....)